Don't go to the casino without this...

Slots, roulette and a green elf...

I had to look twice. But it was true... a green elf was sitting on top of one of the slot machines in a casino in Watford I’d decided to visit for research purposes. Astute readers will know that Watford is the town, just north of London, where pop singer Elton John hails from.

Even more astute readers will know that Elton John once tried to hit me with a $1M lawsuit, on account of me, a journalist, making certain information about him public. In truth, the incident was no more than a game perennially played out by Earth hominids.

In any event, upon spying the aforementioned green elf sitting serenely on the slot machine, I felt that it might be worth investing some small change into the machine that I was told would produce money if you get certain elements into alignment.

No one else in the casino appeared to have noticed the green elf and he (for it was a he) hadn’t made any attempt to speak to me. But I thought it unwise to try and engage him in conversation due to the fact that the other Earth bipeds in the room might consider me an escapee from Bedlam.

Nevertheless, the green elf smiled a knowing smile, and, at that same moment Elton John's rather raucous song from the 1970s, "Saturday Night's Alright for Fighting", started playing on the casino's sound system.

Compared to the previous music that had been playing it was somewhat out of place. And then, as if to order, a fight broke out next to the roulette table, leading the security guards to intervene and throw out the miscreants who, presumably, had “seen red” and let their emotions get the better of them..

Even odder, at the very same moment, the slot machine I’d put money into appeared to be throwing a monumental fit, its lights flashing on and off furiously, and making the most disconcerting “honking” noise.

Was it enraged at having a green elf making himself at home on top of it?

Hard to say. In any event, the machine seemed to have decided that I’d won the jackpot.

I looked up at the green elf, who winked at me and duly disappeared. I shrugged and collected my winnings, then left the casino to go to my car.

As it was a cold winter’s night I quickly switched on the engine to get the heat going. Rather than drive off, I sat there for a while reflecting upon my strange, and let it be said, rather lucrative, evening at the casino. All told, I hadn’t been in the establishment for more than an hour, and yet I’d spied a green elf and had acquired a sizable sum of money.

Whatever was going on? Was there any rhyme or reason to it?

Who can tell? In any case, I wound down the car window, poked my head out, and looked up at the three-quarters’ full moon. I felt an unusual sense of energy flowing through me, which appeared to be emanating from the moon itself. It struck me that the green elf had not been what he appeared to be; more likely he (or it) was an information download from the lunar sphere.

Naturally, one has to be careful with these things, as the moon is the “Great Influencer” on the mentation systems of the inhabitants of Earth. It causes the emotional ups and downs that nearly all Earth’s bipeds seem to go through on a daily basis. They are blown hither and thither by their emotional centers and all sorts of havoc ensues - such as wars and fighting, which don’t end until the emotional tension has been released, and many are left dead or maimed.

On a more localized level, and lesser scale, you see this replicated in family and friendship situations, along with the mating relationships that Earth bipeds engage in.

In fact, it was clear to me that Elton John's musical homage to fighting (in a hooligan sense) suddenly playing on the casino’s sound system was a direct manifestation of the moon's influence.

It was the same with the lucky windfall I had. All down to the lunar orb’s emanations.

The question is: what should you never go to the casino without? As in, what should you always take with you?

Let me know in the comments. And don't forget to let me know what the green elf’s name was. I would like to send him a thank-you card. Which I will send care of NASA and the upcoming Artemis missions to the lunar orb.